Friday, September 14, 2018

Week 4: When Luck Runs Out

I start this story by telling you that I’ve been lucky. I survived to manhood in Ancient Greece, which is no small feat. I was one of the warriors who was picked by Odysseus to travel to Troy. I managed to survive a war that lasted for ten long years. Finally, I’m headed home to Ithaca. I’ll see my son and wife again; I’m sure my son is a man in his own now.
            Odysseus is a little funny, but he is a great leader. After all, he managed to keep us alive for so long. Those of us on his ship anyway. The others were destroyed a while back. It’s a little hard to keep track of the days and weeks, or even months, on the ocean. One day bleeds into the next. Although some of them stand out. Like the monster we encountered, with the one eye. That was terrifying, especially when he ate a couple of the men. But I’m lucky that I survived that too, I guess. 
            We’re finally back on the ocean again. I don’t know exactly why Odysseus made us go to the land of the dead, but after one last talk with Circe we’re headed home again. Odysseus tends to get distracted, but I know he’s as homesick as the rest of us. Circe gave him some advice apparently. There are these things called Sirens up ahead; Odysseus said they sing songs so beautiful you try to reach them on their island and end up dying. But, him being him, he wants to listen to their song. So all of us now have wax in our ears so we can’t hear anything. A couple other guys tied Odysseus to the mast. I can see him from my position at an oar if I turn my head the right way. A few minutes ago he was just standing there, but now he’s struggling, pretty badly too. I’d think he’d hurt himself if I didn’t know how tightly bound he is. 

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It took a while, but Odysseus isn’t struggling anymore. He’d told us that meant we were out of hearing of the sirens’ song. It does feel nice to take the wax out of my ears. You don’t realize how much you rely on your hearing for balance, especially on the ocean. 
I know there’s more dangers ahead. I wish Odysseus would tell us exactly, but he’s been a little vague. At some point there’s a monstrous whirlpool by some cliffs. Or a monster that is a whirlpool. After he was removed from the mast he gave a speech, told us not to worry and to trust him, basically. All of us do, especially since he's led us this far. Now that we're approaching the whirlpool, he's gotten more specific. Apparently we’ve got to stick as close to the cliffs as we can without actually hitting them. It’s the only way to avoid getting sucked into the whirlpool.
That whirlpool is terrifying, now that we’re close. I can feel the blood drain from my face, and saw it reflected in my companion’s face. I catch a glimpse of Odysseus, and had enough time to wonder why he was in his armor on a ship when it happens.
Something tight and sharp grabs me by the shoulder, and suddenly I’m lifted into the air. My screams mingle with those of others, and I manage to see that a horrible, monster has grabbed me with only one of its heads. There are others also caught by the heads, and we’re all screaming desperately as the monster drags us into the cave. I catch a last glimpse, impossibly, of Odysseus, standing there in full armor and looking after us as we die.
I guess my luck finally ran out.

(Source: The Book Palace)

Author’s note: This is the last segment of Kline's translation of The Odyssey that’s available for the readings. Everything up until this part has been backstory: Odysseus is explaining his tale to the Phaeacians, whose shore he washed up on. From there Odysseus eventually makes his way back home. All in all, he was gone for ten years fighting the Trojan War, and it took him another ten years to get back home.
Odysseus’s journey took a long time for various reasons, but one of them is because of the interference of the gods. The aforementioned cyclops is a son of Poseidon. When Odysseus injured the cyclops, Poseidon cursed him and interfered with his trip home. In the end, none of Odysseus’s men made it home with him.
I ended up taking the perspective of one of the sailors for that reason. It’s miraculous that a lot of them survived the war to head home (initially there were twelve ships that left Troy; as mentioned in the story all but Odysseus’s ship were destroyed). I liked the idea of one of them making it so far, and thinking they were so close to home, only to miss out. There’s a lot more in the Odyssey that I didn’t mention, because it would take too long, but the same idea is there.

6 comments:

  1. Hi Madison

    I like reading your story especially the title since it kind of goes hand and hand with a recent experience in my life. I feel like you reflected the image of The Odyssey really well and i like how intense you made the part of the whirlpool. This is a good story and has also inspired me to look into these types of stories to write about for the storybook project.

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  2. Hey Madison

    I didn't have time to read Part B of this story and reading this was very interesting. I know Odysseus was planning on going to Hades but I didn't know he was sacrificing his entire crew to get there. Also I really like how you put in the thing about balance on the ocean and how you needed your hearing for that.

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  3. Hey Madison!
    I really liked that you put the perspective on one of the sailors instead. I feel like we're so used to having the point of view on someone of higher precedence such as Odysseus. I wonder why the sailor is so lighthearted about everything. In your story, he seemed very innocent and curious. Although people were dying left and right, he didn't seem too panicked or overwhelmed. I guess he just had strong nerves and courage. What if you talked more about the backstory. Like what happened with Circe previously, and how did they get into this situation. What is their goal in mind? I'm assuming that they are just trying to make it back home to Ithica. Why did they have to go to the land of the dead previously? Maybe just give a little more backstory. Overall, I really enjoyed your story. It had some humor by portraying the story in the perspective of a sailor instead.

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  4. Hi Madison,
    I really liked the first-person narrative format of your story. It’s interesting to read about the story as well. It looks like a story of sea adventure and challenges that characters face along the way. It also caught my attention how the “I”-person character cares so much about Odysseus who picked him as a warrior. I also found it interesting why Odysseus gave a speech not to worry or trust him. If Odysseus is a leader, I think it is kind of ineffective to give speeches like that because I think it can discourage the crew. I also liked the vivid description of the scene about the whirlpool: I could clearly imagine the blood drain in the characters’ faces. I really like the description of the monster with several heads: this is one of the most interesting monster figures that I have found.
    I wonder why all the crew in the ship care so much about Odysseus. He must be the most important figure in the story. I really like your amazing story, but I think the story would be even more interesting if I can know who the “I” is.

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  5. Hi Madison, I love your story! I need to read more monster stories/odysseus. I really like the tension you built up, relieved, and then built up in the end again. I thought that when the sailors took the wax out of their ears, they would find out Odysseus betrayed them and they would steer into the cliffs of the sirens; but then they didn't, and I relaxed a little - only to find out they still weren't safe in the end! Awesome story

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  6. Hey Madison! I just finished reading your story, and I loved it. I thought you had a lot of creative and unique ideas that you incorporated into your story. Adding in the different point of views throughout the story made the story that more interesting. After reading your story, I want to read more that are similar. Overall, nice job!

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